Putting on the dog...

The most wonderful time of the year has just past, Christmas, that is, and we are now on to a new year. As I contemplate '08, I am reminded that Happy New Year rings true only as long as I do. I am reading a book, more like a letter in book form, by Brennan Manning, the incredible author who was in Visalia less than two weeks ago. What he shared then and what I am going to share now might make a small difference as we look to navigate another 12 months, one minute at a time. Then again, maybe not. Read on, who knows what will happen?

E.E. Cummings is quoted in the Preface to this insightful book, saying: "To be nobody but yourself in a world which is doing its best day and night to make you everybody else, means to fight the hardest battle which any human being can fight, and never stop fighting."

Interesting quote, especially for me, as a person who has spent a lifetime trying to fit in and be different at the same time. Which leads to, guess what, insecurity and fear of what people think of me. So I go incognito. I put on my spiritual make-up ... worship team member, business leader, church member, good father, whatever, so those on the outside won't see who I really am. Weak, alone, fearful, hateful, grumpy, afraid of the future. Yet...

Manning says, "God calls us to stop hiding and come openly to him. God is the father who ran to his prodigal son when he came limping home. God weeps over us when shame and self hatred immobilize us."

"God loves us as we really are," says Manning, "whether we like it or not." Well of course we don't like it, that would be too easy and, well, REAL LIFE just isn't like that, is it? What is "real life" anyway? Our parent's told us about real life, but for our own good. They didn't want us to become "starry-eyed dreamers, " what good would we be? No good, apparently. Still, something inside calls me to believe. In what? Love?

"His love, which called us into existence, calls us to come out of self hatred and to step into his truth." Hmmmm, if God "called me into existence," well, maybe, just maybe, he knew what he was doing. Yeah, that's it. He knew what he was doing. Can I live with that in 2008?

"I've gotta be me," the old song says. It's worth a try ... no, I'm worth the try. Called by love into existence. That's me. You, too? Now that's real life.

Happy New Year!